I don’t even know if this is allowed here.
I need. To write, to learn, to speak to the universe.
I want. To…well. There’s the rub. The crux. The problem.
Im afraid I have lost my way.
My Master no longer guides me, I feel…no…not I…not ME…the slave feels neglected. She was let out of her dark box for one glorious year and now she’s back. Wilting, stunted, crying out for something. And she doesn’t know how to say it.
But I.
ME. I am a grown ass woman. I’m strong. i can take anything life throws at me. He loves me because of that right? Maybe? I no longer know, I was never sure. And that’s why I love him, because I’m a masochist in every sense. If he was emotionally available and outwardly affectionate, I’d think he’s a pussy.
but he wants to train a new sub (maybe? We never quite cleared that one up). He wants this when I ache for his touch, for his power…and he’s lost interest. He needs a new toy, and here it is again.
Always, the slave repels them. And she hides. Because they can always accept the slave in others, but not her.
Wow, this first posting is hella Depressing.